[Wedding in Korea] Different points of view about Korean wedding

6/23/2017 Anonymous 0 Comments

Today we are having two guests in the blog !
A Korean Wedit team member is joining me as well as a French-Moroccan friend to know more about the cultural differencies you can encounter when it comes to interracial wedding.
These are personnal points of view so understand that other Korean, Moroccan or French people might think otherwise! 

·      Generally speaking, what is your definition of a wedding ?

🇫🇷   A ceremony that celebrates the love of the people.
🇰🇷  It means that a life companion has been found.

·      What meaning does it have ?

🇫🇷  It can be religious or cultural but in both cases It is supposed to be in the image of the bride and the groom. It is supposed to represent them and their love for each other.
🇰🇷  In the parents generation point of view, it is a life result, something that has to be done. People who don’t get married were seen as marginals. Nowadays, people over 30 years old who are not married are usual and more and more people think that marriage is not something that has to be done to succeed in life.

·      What is the importance of your parent’s point of view in your mariage/ceremony planning ?

🇫🇷  It is important because my parents are the people I usually go to when I need advice but at the same time, it is MY time so it has to be done to please me and the groom and no one else.
🇰🇷  My parents have been helping me building my life and they have experience so their opinion counts. If they don’t agree with me, I will think more about my choices. As for the planning, most parents in the Korean culture pay for the wedding so they do have their word to say but if they don’t pay for it, of course I don’t need to follow their lead.

·      If you got married with somone who has another culture, would you like them to follow your culture, would you want to follow their or would you have a fusion ceremony ? Why ?

🇫🇷  I would either have a fusion of culture or two separate ceremonies but I will definitely not ask anyone to give up their culture for me because I wouldn’t want them to ask that from me either.
🇰🇷  I would have a fusion wedding. Even if the culture is the same, the background will be different and I believe a wedding needs to be the reflect of the two people.

·      Is your partner background important ? (education, environment, work, etc)

🇫🇷   I guess it is, mainly because we need to have points on common but differences are also important in my opinion, otherwise where is the fun and how could I learn anything from my other half if the both of us share the same background.
🇰🇷   More than the background, I think the person personality is more important. But it cannot be ignored either because it would be difficult to be with someone who doesn’t fit your principle for example. As for the education, it doesn’t matter as far as there is no jealousy for the partner considering the fact that education is still an important criteria in Korea.

·      Would you live with your partner before marriage or not, and why ?

🇫🇷   Definitely yes If I have the opportunity. I believe that you never know someone completely unless you have lived with them and that’s also another way to avoid any bad surprise.
🇰🇷  In the time, that wasn’t’ possible in Korea. Know I think that if we have plan to marry or in the process of planning the wedding alreay, it is okay to live together. If not, I don’t think I could.

·      If I say Korean wedding, what do you think about first ?

🇫🇷   Hanbok. The traditional dress
🇰🇷   Too many guests, too crowded, too busy.  

·      How much do you know about the korean traditional wedding ?

🇫🇷  Pretty much nothing to be honest. I have never had to occasion to be part of one.
🇰🇷   Don’t know much either. I actually never saw a real Korean traditional wedding.

·      What is your vision about the Korean family when it comes to marriage ?

🇫🇷   The first thing that comes to my mind when I think about Korean marriage is living with the family-in-law.
🇰🇷   In my parents generation, there was that idea that the woman leave her family to go in the man one. Nowadays, that’s not the case anymore, at all. This is the couple choice and that’s it.

·      If you had to put a Korean traditional part in your ceremony, which one would it be ?

🇫🇷  The traditional food I guess, I don’t know much so that’s the first thing that comes to my mind.
🇰🇷  I think I would do bows. It might be weird having the couple greeting each other during the ceremony for other cultures but I think it is very meaningful.

·      What do you think of weddings in weddings hall ? Have you attended one ?

🇫🇷  They are fancy for sure ! Looking like a real American romantic movie for teenagers.
🇰🇷   I did went to a lot of wedding halls. Before working in Wedit I didn’t had any special thought about it. Now that I know more about the wedding market, wedding halls look very weird. In the  time, there was a strong congratulation feeling in eddings but now it looks more like a trasaction between the couple and their guests, a social duty. Wedding hall culture seems to be all about money and pay back.

·      What do you think about the couple parent’s inviting their friends or coworkers even if the couple don’t know them ?

🇫🇷   Inviting few close friends or far relatives that the couple might not know is alright but I would be bothered if my parents invited random friends, coworkers, why not the neighbours as well !
🇰🇷  In Korea, parents are important in the wedding, they are like the secondary character of the show. If their children get maried, they want to show it to people as it is a pride. This is the reason why they tend to invite a lot of people but more and more couples wish less guests.

·      Any other random thoughts about Korea traditional weddings or wedding halls ?

🇫🇷   Do they know all the people they invite because the ones I’ve seen on tv shows seemed pretty huge.
🇰🇷  If there is a thing I dislike more than other things in wedding halls, it is the design ? There is no fun in it, it is boring. The couple looks like dolls you put here and there for the show. They have no liberty in their own ceremony. Jure too, I don’t like them, they are weird and not creative at all.

·     When getting married, each guests offer an envelop with money for the couple. Each guest will give a different amount depending on their relationship with the couple. They will also write their name and the amount they give in a guestbook. What do you think about it ?

🇫🇷   We do the same in my culture. People either give money or a gift. I don’t think it’s odd but I wonder if depending on the amount people will be judge, in this case I’m not too keen on it. Bringing gifts or money to the couple is more a kind thought than a duty.
🇰🇷  There is a reason for that. In the time, people were going to the bride or groom parents house to help with the preparation, food and such but now, weddings are not at home anymore, there are a lot of guests and the culture has changed so people can’t help anymore. Instead they started little by little to give money. It is now a bit too much all about money but I can understand it.

·      In Korean wedding, especially in wedding halls, guests tend to drop the money and go eat to the buffet, sometimes without watching the ceremony. What do you think about it ? What would you do if it happened during your wedding or how would you anticipate that kind of behaviour ?

🇫🇷   Hey cheaper buffet and good food bro! Jokes aside, I would maybe avoid having a buffet and have people sited to have dinner served after the ceremony instead.
🇰🇷  Because there are a lot of guests in Korean weddings, most of them are not that close to the couple. So they will just greet them, give the money, go eat and leave after watching a bit of the ceremony, or not at all. Personally, I don’t want that either for my wedding.

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