Tips on dealing with possible arguments when marrying with Korean

3/23/2017 Anonymous 0 Comments

Being an international couple means living a life full of discovers and also means learning to live with deep differences most of the time occurring from deep gap of two other cultures.
When dating, such differences can become difficulties but how is it when planning a wedding ?

International couples can face different kind of obstacles during the process : 

Planning difficulties

Most of the time, only one person can speak the language of the country which makes it difficult for the other person who can be frustrated not to be involved as much as she/he would like to be. When contacting vendors, or even searching for anything related to the wedding, if everything has to be done in a language we don’t know or not fluently, it could make the other one to be put aside.

Our tips
If you are the one being in your own country, try to involve your other half in every things she/he can do. Good at mathematics ? Taking care of the budget can be great ! Want to have a DYI decoration? Try it with your fiancé, because there is no need to communicate that much to build things ! etc. The most important point will be to find everything she/he can do so she/he feel like you two are planning your own wedding together.

Our help
As we explained in our last article, Wedit can contact vendors for you and/or do the interpretation if you need too. In order for you two to be involved at the same level, we offer our services in Korean, English, Japanese, Chinese and French !

Cultural difficulties

You probably faced some cultural difficulties while dating your other half. But while planning a wedding, these can get even bigger. Korean culture and traditions are still pretty strong, especially in older generation which can lead to some misunderstandings. Indeed, most of our international couples encounter the following situations :

When planning a wedding, even if you wish it to be the best day of your couple life, you also want your guests and especially families to know how beautiful that day is and to feel the love all around. But with two different cultures, it can be difficult to satisfy both sides :
you are having your wedding in Korea so your Korean part of the family might not understand why you don’t want to follow all the proceedings they are used to ; for example, inviting the WHOLE family whom you've never met them at all, as well as the parent’s friends or coworkers.

Another difficulty you have probably faced already can be due to daily life cultural differencies. Ever went in your family-in-law house and received stress because « if you marry our son/daughter who is Korean, you should do this and that, etc » ? If not, you are lucky enough to be in a less conservative family than some other people who are. But if you do, this kind of pressure can be even less bearable during wedding planning.

And finally, more « wedding technically » speaking, the ceremony scenario writting can also be an obstacle. Indeed, both countries probably don’t have the same kind of ceremony and sometimes it can be very hard mixing the two.  

Our tips
Most of our couples had difficulties with the Korean side of the family. This is the reason why we are giving you these examples but keep in mind that the cultural difficulties can also come from the other side of the family!

Also, those situations are very difficult for the one who is stuck between his family who is putting pressure on him and his partner so try not to fight because of it and keep remembering that the most important thing in your wedding is your couple ! You will never be able to fully satisfy each of your guests so concentrate on what you two really want.

As for the scenario, have a talk about which part you really want to be included in your ceremony and which one you can take off to make a perfect mixture of your two cultures.

Our help
With our international experience, we are able to give you advice on how to mix your two worlds. We also often get to talk too-worried or too-demanding parents in order to explain them that you might not be able to do everything they would like to.
As for the ceremony scenario and other technical things, we do have special tools at Wedit which make a fusion between Korean and Western cultures.

Distance difficulties

Another difficulty for the non-Korean person is the distance between her/him and her/his family. Having this important day planned, most of the time with the Korean parents very present, without his/her own parents, family and friends can be difficult for both side.

Indeed, the family staying far away can feel put aside while the other family can be involved more easily and the foreign groom or bride can also feel put down, as she/he can’t have all the support and help wanted for its own family and as her/his guestlist will be less important, for example.

Our tips
You are the Korean one of the couple ? 

  • Take care of how your the other half would feel, considering that his/her family is distant from him/her. 
  • Try not to invite hundreds of your friends if she/he will have only 5 of them willing to come in Korea for the wedding.
  • Try also to involve the family members (or at least the parents) who are far by updating them on how the planning is going by skype or phone call more than emails which are less personnal.

Our help
We sure cannot make your country come closer to Korea but we do can give you tips on how to involve your family and also try to explain your Korean partners and his/her family that they have to take care of you and your family even more than they would normally do, because of this distance situation.

You might not face all those difficulties but if you do, we will love help you planning your wedding and facing those obstacles, source of a stress you don’t need during the process of organising your ceremony.

You can visit our homepage to know more about our service or check our pdf here.
Don’t hesitate to ask all your questions through our website chat box or at well !

Hope to hear from you very soon ~

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